"Relationship Advice for Creating the New Year the Way You Want It To Be"
Susie and Otto Collins

As the new year approaches, most people think about making changes for the better in their lives--and we think you probably are doing the same.

In every moment, not just at new year's, we have the opportunity to create our relationships and our lives the way we want them to be.

That certainly doesn't mean that those close to us are the ones who have to change for our relationships to be better.

It means that we have the opportunity to change our attitudes and thoughts to include more joy, happiness and love--no matter what the other person is thinking or doing.

Our focus has to change from worrying about the past, rehashing past hurts and grievances to what do we want our life experience to be.

We have to quit the "I wish I had..." or "Why
did I..." or "Why did he or she..." thoughts of what happened in the past and just focus on what we needed to do in the present moment.

Think about how valuable this change
of focus would be for you to do, especially at this time as you approach the beginning of a new year.

You, we and in fact all of us can let go of the thoughts that have held us back.

Thoughts like guilt, blame, judgment and
anything else that limit us and our relationships--and focus on what is possible and what we want in this coming new year.

Whether you consciously create new year's resolutions or not, if you're like most people, as the new year approaches, you have thoughts of what you want either more of or less of in the coming year.

In order to create more vibrant, alive, loving relationships and to live a better life, we suggest that you take a few moments to think about what you want.

Here are a few ideas to help you do that and to be more successful in keeping your new year's resolutions...


1 . Don't Take on the World--Change 1 Thing

Choose one relationship or one area of your life that you would like to improve.

It may be a truly troubled relationship with someone close to you or it might be that you want a closer connection with your partner in a relationship that's already good.

It might be that you want to spend more time with your family or work more efficiently at your job or even to find a job that will be more in alignment with what you want.

Whatever it is, make a conscious choice to improve that relationship or area of your life in this coming year.

2. Choose one thing that you could do on a consistent basis that would make a difference in this relationship or in this area of your life.

It might be to focus more on what you appreciate or love about this person instead of what has happened in the past.

It might be to spend more time interacting with this person instead of watching television or cruising the internet.

It might be to just listen to what this person needs to tell you and you say what you need to say--from your heart.

It might be to take one step--like doing some research--about a job that you think you might like.

It might be to forgive yourself or someone else for what happened in the past.

3. Do That One Thing Consistently

Whatever you choose that would improve your relationships or life, don't just do it once and then forget about it. Keep doing it over and over. Make this "one thing" a habit that you practice as you would brushing your teeth or taking a shower every day.

4. Stay in the present moment and don't allow yourself to "live" in the past. Keep moving toward your goal and what you want more of in your life instead of what you don't want.

Worry, blame, judgment, control, sarcasm, fear will only keep you stuck in what "has been."

Choose to create something new and maybe even wonderful by focusing on what you can do right now in this present moment instead
of dwelling on what you wish had happened or not happened in the past.

No More Jealousy

ReStart the Spark