Cybercheating IS real!
In this digital age, it’s super fast and super easy to communicate and connect with people who live on the other side of the world. It’s also, unfortunately, super easy to have an online affair.
Especially with the ever-growing use of social networking sites like Facebook and Twitter, socializing with others has been taken to a whole new level.
This can be wonderful for keeping up with family and friends who live far away. This can be a nightmare if you mistrust your partner or have a jealous habit, because there are so many opportunities for your partner to do something that undermines your relationship.
The confusion about what your partner is doing while online is very real. You probably don’t want to or can’t hover and watch when he or she is online.
Partly for this reason, you may worry because it’s relatively simple to make up false identities or to lie about who you are when on the internet. It’s also no trouble to find “private” places to chat or even engage in online sex.
It is dangerous to image that your partner is betraying you while online. If you were cheated on in a past relationship or if for some other reason you have a hard time trusting your partner, your worries and fears about what could be going on could lead you to make unfair accusations and cause conflict.
What makes online affairs that much more difficult is that some people don’t consider them infidelity. If there’s literally no physical/sexual contact, sometimes, the assumption is made that it doesn’t “count” as cheating.
There’s no doubt that online affairs can be difficult to detect and can be easily misconstrued. It’s vital that you have reliable and verifiable facts you can count on.
Here are 6 signs that your partner might be having an online affair:
He or she is….
#1: Secretive about online activity.
Secretiveness is a definite red flag!
If your partner mostly gets online after you’ve gone to bed or if he or she quickly shuts off the computer when you walk into the room, there may be something being hidden from you.
If during casual conversations about his or her time online, your partner becomes evasive or gets defensive, pay closer attention.
#2: Spends more time online than before.
These days, a lot of us spend a lot of time on the internet. We pay bills, read the news, keep up with sports scores, correspond with business associates and friends and play some of the thousands of online games available.
Just because your partner spends a lot of time online, this doesn’t necessarily mean he or she is cybercheating. But, if you have noticed a marked increase in the amount of time your partner is on the internet, this is something to look more closely at.
If your partner tends to come home from work and almost immediately gets online, it could be a warning sign that there’s more going on than just surfing the web.
#3: Withdraws from you.
Any unexplained and significant change in behavior can be a sign of infidelity– online or otherwise. If you have noticed a decrease in the amount of sex your partner will have with you or if he or she is less talkative and open with you, watch more closely for other possible signs of an affair.
#4: Dismisses what he or she does online.
Some people consider the things they do online to be “no big deal” or “just flirting.” If you know that your partner is interacting with others in a sexual (explicit or not) way, he or she may dismiss your objections and might not consider this to be cheating.
Know this… if the behaviors break trust and the monogamy agreements you two have, even though they are online, it IS cheating.
#5: There is general disconnection in your relationship.
Wake up and take notice if you feel disconnection and distance between you and your partner. Even if there is no cheating going on, this is deadly for a relationship.
Disconnection might be when you two rarely spend quality time together. Or, it could feel like you two are just roommates or co-parents and not lovers like you used to be.
#6: You find suspicious posts and email.
We caution you about snooping in your partner’s email account/s or going through his or her phone unless there is no other way to get reliable information. But, if you notice suggestive posts between your partner and another man or woman on Facebook or Twitter or you happen to see an email between your partner and someone else that is suspicious, take this seriously.
*Please remember, these signs may or may not mean that your partner is having an online affair. If you notice any or all of these warning signs in your partner or relationship, follow up and get facts you can rely upon before making a final decision about what is best for you.